O Canada!

Fear Trump's lies, not our great neighboring nation

There’s no doubt that relations between Canada and the United States are worse than they have ever been, at least since the mid-19th century, when we stopped threatening to invade and conquer the Canadians.

That’s entirely due to the senseless, inflammatory and just plain stupid threats by Donald Trump, who continues to babble that Canada should become the 51st state. Michigan would be far better off as Canada’s eleventh province, but neither thing is going to happen.

There are also all sorts of horror stories about what happens to Americans who try to visit Canada. Supposedly, we’ll be stopped at the border when we tried to return, thrown in a cell, and our phones confiscated to see if we’d said anything derogatory about the Creamsicle fascist. Well, I went to Windsor last night for a belated birthday dinner at Spago, a wonderful small chain of Italian restaurants.

We had a superb and amazing meal for probably half the price we would have paid in Detroit or its suburbs, if we even had such good neighborhood places, which of course we don’t. When we came back, I was prepared for the gulag. since I’ve been writing anti-trump and anti-fascist screeds for decades, but nobody at either border crossing had the slightest interest in my phone, or anything else…

Except, that is, for the very last border guard I saw after I came back to America through the tunnel. “Excuse me, sir, but didn’t you used to write columns in the Metro Times?” he said. I admitted it openly.

“I loved them! It’s a pleasure to meet you,” he said. I suppose Kristi the puppy killer has had him shot by now, but if so, I hope that nice young man died knowing he made my day.

Support Canada - and let them know you do.

And don’t believe the lies designed to keep you scared.